Finding my 'mommy style' Part 1

 

 Shirt: Downeast Outfitters, Pants: H&M, Shoes: TJMaxx

Everyone warns you how the transition into mommyhood is going to take some time, but I didn't realize how hard it would be emotionally and physically when it came to stepping confidently into motherhood. I definitely know I'm Hilton's mommy. We cry tears together and giggle together, but I still don't register myself as 'mom' in my list of titles. I don't see myself as mom because I don't wear mom jeans and I don't talk all day about my children. Or at least I don't think I do.

The transition to embracing mommyhood has been slow. However the reality of my wardrobe quickly struck me. Like day one postpartum. Even though I dropped my baby weight quickly and was back to pre-baby weight three months postpartum, my body was NOWHERE near the same. I was up a size in pants because hello I all of a sudden got hips way bigger than what I'd ever had before, and shirts are just so much more snug I feel so much more comfortable in shirts a size up from my pre-baby size. So sadly the majority of my Nordstrom clothes from my year of working there no longer fit. And all the clothes I could still squeeze into from my high school days pre-baby were not even close to getting past my thighs-let alone buttoned-post baby.

When I was preparing to go back to work I underwent a dramatic downsizing in my closet to find what I could or would wear to work, leaving me with only three work pants and two pairs of jeans, and cleaning out our entire spare closet which was full of my old clothes and sending them all to the D.I. Unfortunately the reality of being a new first time mom is that there are still a lot of things to buy for baby even after the baby showers. Because a lot of my extra money the first five to six months was spent on baby clothes, formula, and diapers instead of replacing my own wardrobe immediately I have felt like the clothes I feel confident in have been in short supply around here and it's taken my a while to find and gather new items I'm happy to be 'mom' in. On top of that since I really didn't buy any new clothes for myself or keep up on trends while I was pregnant, I honestly feel like I've missed an entire year on fashion now that Hilton is already 10 months old. I have to ask coworkers if 'that's still in style' or what's popular for this or that now.

I'm slowly feeling out what I like and what I don't in the current fashion trends. What I feel comfortable in and what I don't. Unfortunately my old style of soft breezy blouses I used to love wearing I now feel completely self-conscious in. I prefer structured patterned shirts and blouses that make a statement by themselves. Also I don't have time to do my hair fancy nor do I wear fun or pretty jewelry because a) I don't have time for it and b) Hilton yanks on it or slobbers on it. Therefore my outfit needs to be able to stand on its own. I'm redefining what's a priority to me based less on just looks and more on function and comfort.

And slowly, I'm defining what it means to be 'mom' for me.

p.s. according to Jared this shirt looks like it was made by someone who didn't have enough of either fabric to make one shirt out of one or the other so they combined scraps. That made me laugh. I didn't really have any response other than 'it was cute' and 'I like it'. Which in this case is all I need I feel like. 

Your Tenth Month

You're still not walking but crawling like crazy all over the place and definitely starting to get into things you shouldn't like my tupperware cupboard, pulling out the outlet plugs, and playing in the dogs bowls. I had to actually remove the dogs water bowls from the kitchen because you decided you would play in it and tip it over and I think I actually saw you try to drink out of it. Super gross! You have developed some new facial expression, your scowling face and your flirting has really gone up a notch or two. You flirted with the cutting lady at Joann's the other day and it was so cute because you went between flirting and being grumpy about it being nap time.

You caught up again on length and weight and are back to the 90% for height again. You're still fitting into eighteen month clothing but I don't think you'll fit into them too much longer. We actually started to switch you over to cow's milk from formula because the doctor said you're big enough and I'm tired of paying so much on formula. So far you're doing great and are almost all the way switched over but still get constipated and uncomfortable so we're taking it slow.

You still only have two teeth, I'm kind of worried about when you will have more come in. But all in good time. We are still broadening your horizons as far as self feeding is going. You've had mashed potatoes, whole carrots that have been cooked, corn (you hated it), and a variety of crackers and other things. We stopped giving you almond or rice milk because you didn't really like them at all so it seemed pointless. I think they were just too sweet for you.

Your sleeping schedule has definitely improved, still sleeping through the night and your naps are almost always right on an hour and a half twice a day. Mom definitely looks forward to this time because it means a break and chance to do extra housework I can't normally do when you're awake (like unload the dishwasher because you climb on top of the door).

This entire month you have been sick unfortunately. You got your first serious illness of a double pink eye infection since the hospital visit in January. Thank goodness it was bacterial and you could use antibiotics to help get rid of it so that didn't last long but you also had a cold basically the entire month so it was kind of a rough one for you unfortuantely. Here's to hoping no more sickness comes to our house!

Love you sweet Hilton

Your Ninth Month

You are definitely and officially on the move little man! You can get from the nursery to the kitchen crawling faster than I can walking. Needless to say you are definitely getting into things faster than mommy can steer you away or remove them from your reach. We have started to truly baby-proof especially as you have started to find cupboards and become curious about what is behind those doors. You are starting to truly express multiple emotions and know when people are doting on you and you become a huge cheeser. You are walking along furniture and learned to crawl into people's laps.

You have finally slowed down on length growth but put on some weight, you are now only in the 80% for height and 59% for weight. I have a feeling you'll slim down again once you're walking. You have officially transitioned into your convertible carseat as we are already having to move the straps higher and take out some of the additional padding. We're now completely into 18 month clothing but they're just a tiny bit loose which is fine for me if they last you for more than two months time.

You still only have two teeth, and I'm really hoping that you break some very soon. You are able to self feed really well now, spaghetti o's, mac and cheese, toast, goldfish, graham crackers (these are your favorite). We've really basically stopped feeding him pureed food but have started introducing drinks other than water and formula like rice milk or almond milk. He seems to like them but definitely thinks they're weird. They're extremely sweet compared to his formula so it will be an interesting transition at one year to cows milk instead of formula. And I'm really looking forward to no longer having to pay for formula!

You are still sleeping through the night like a champ but we are REALLY struggling with naps of late. You get a measly half hour to forty five minute nap in the morning and then a super long two hour nap in the afternoon's. I don't quite know what to do to get them figured out but I think we're progressing to only one long nap in the day. You have all of a sudden started hating bath time, I can't tell if it's because you are bored with the toys in your bathtub or if you are just more interested in what is going on outside the tub but you try to climb out about five minutes about I put you in and then you are ice cold and freezing because you won't sit down.

Of late you love crawling up to the piano and patting on the keys, and anything with wheels. Needless to say almost every single one of your Christmas toys involves wheels of some kind. Well, besides that books that is. Happy nine months little man!