Thursday, July 26, 2012

Nine

It's days like today that I feel as low as I can go, I just have to start counting my blessings and dreams. I have a dark black secret that I so badly want to share, but I know I shouldn't. So instead I'll tell you the little things that made me smile today.

1. dreaming of learning french. Someday when all this ridiculous high educated learning (college) is done, I will be able to do things like this. Someday.
2. planning on running two Ragnar race's in the next year. Las Vegas November 9-10 and Wasatch Back June 21-22. I'm glad to have something to train for.
3. starting work at Nordstrom Rack-which I love! Taking a break from CNA work is really nice and I suspect rather permanent. I'm grateful for my three years of being a nurse's aide but, it's time to move on.
4. friends. New friends at a new job that are overly willing to help and answer questions and give me fashion advice. Don't we all love new friends? It's like a fresh start each time, and as we get older each fresh start gets better.
5.  having an awesome VW Jetta TDI to drive and pass all the crazy mini-van drivers on my way to and from school. It's the little joys of passing cars and not getting pulled over. And still getting 45 MPG.
6. getting a back to school jacket that is quite stunningly cute. Thinking that my last fall semester at BYU begins within a month is just unfathomable. Even though I'm going to looking stunningly cute.
7.  finally learn Clair De Lune on my brand new-to me-piano. It's going to take quite a while to get that baby down pat, but I can do it.
8. having a husband and dogs who cuddle with me and give me loves and kisses when I need them. On days like today.
9. reading this blog, and loving everything she had to say about her dog. It gave me some ideas for my blog. Because with this dark blackness inside of me that I'm holding in and onto, I just can't bear to blog about the things I really want to say. Not yet. Just not now. But I can blog about my sweet puppies, because everyone loves life from the perspective of a dog. Especially our crazy ones.

so on a day that I'm feeling the blues, and I want to focus on the disappointments and sadness I feel, I can share at least nine good things. And I promise, I will try harder to not focus on the blackness. Remind myself of the things I love, and find new things to give attention to. And maybe someday let everybody in on this whole secrety thing I feel. Someday.

Life...

3 comments:

Katie A. said...

Sorry yesterday wasn't a good day! Love you!

Sondai Seward said...

Can I just tell you that I love your writing style!! I could read your stories all day long. Hope you'll be doing better soon cuz. Love ya!

Chelsa said...

Hope things get better...